I’ve spent this week devoting myself to self-care. I never realized how physically and mentally burnt I was until I spent time taking care of myself and focusing on healing my mind and body. Also this week, I found out that some of my closest friends have been struggling with anxiety and panic attacks due to school, workload, etc. I got a lot of support for focusing on self-care and it’s important that we all look out for each other and encourage our friends and family who are struggling to take care of themselves, to take the time to heal and to recharge our minds and bodies. I love you all and it’s important that you all take the time for self-care.
I’m up early on a Saturday morning. I should be sleeping because I have a long day ahead of me but I can’t. I’m dealing with pain in my legs that turns on and off like a light switch. When it’s off I can move normally (normal for me), but when that pain is turned on, then it’s hard for me to move around and that’s very important for me. I’m also feeling very lonely. It’s very hard for me to admit that because I tend not to express my feelings as much especially when it comes to being lonely. I try to keep myself occupied by working on various project (including my film), and hanging out and being around my friends but that doesn’t help. I just keep a smile on my face and pretend that everything is ok but it’s not. I’m at a point in my life where I want to come home to someone, be able to spend time with and have fun with. It’s rare that I even talk about feeling this way but I guess I couldn’t hold it in anymore.